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"I'm naive enough to think that love is always good, no matter how long ago, no matter the circumstances. I'm not old enough yet to imagine the instances where this isn't true and where regret outweighs everything."

Anne Michaels - Fugitive Pieces

I just finished reading ‘Sacred Hoops - Spiritual Lessons of a Hardwood Warrior’ by Phil Jackson. I was intrigued by the idea that the man that guided The Chicago Bulls to 3 NBA Championship victories in the 1990’s had based his management style on a combination of Zen Philosophy and the principles of the Lakota Indians (can’t imagine either of those would feature in Alex Ferguson’s biography). In the end it was a very ‘lightweight’ but relatively enjoyable read (largely due to the anecdotes of working with Michael Jordan) that had a simple insight; that teams become unified around singular goals and that a degree of selflessness on the part of all team members and its leader is required if the group is to be successful.  I liked the idea that leaders need to take a holistic view of life to get the best from people who work for them (it should probably be required reading for anyone re-entering the banking industries or financial markets) and the choice quote was “ everything derives its essential nature from its dependence on everything else”. Overall not sure it was worth 225 pages, as with many ‘business’ books the insights seemed pretty obvious. The simple message (wrapped up in a sports analogy) applies to most things in life.  I would paraphrase it generically as follows;

Singular Goal      +             Talented Individuals      +             Correct Motivation          = Desired Outcome

(I couldn’t help but think this is where the current Grimsby Town team are going wrong and that maybe the addition of a couple of ‘dream catchers’ and a lava lamp in the Blundell Park dressing room would get them out of their current funk).

It was while I was finishing the book yesterday that through a piece of serendipity a twitter post came through that tapped right into my current thinking, namely how much time is it worth spent reading ‘business’ books. The tweet read “@pJozefak Skip the Books! Find A Mentor and Build a Network Early in Your Career http://bit.ly/12xi3R “ I thought this was a interesting idea as I am a massive believer in the power of Mentors (see www.horsesmouth.co.uk) and it is obvious that in an internet age most books on ‘business’ are outdated by the time they get into print. That notwithstanding it did make me reflect on whether any books, business or otherwise have helped me in my working life and the answer was a definite yes. The right balance between real life experience and the written experience of others has got to be the right answer. Here are five that I’ve found useful and why;

Martin Watkins ‘The First 90 Days’ – solid planning across multiple scenarios for anyone entering a new business.

Alan Leighton ‘On Leadership’ – thoughts from a man (and his network) who went ‘plural’ and has been involved in many of the UK's great businesses.

Robert Pirsig ‘Zen & The Art of Motorcycle Maintenance’ –  a philosophical treatise on life and amongst other things our relationship with technology.

Geoffrey Best 'Churchill - A Study of Greatness' – a man with an appetite for adventure, who reinvented himself multiple times and took the country through WW2. Also a man who drank Champagne for breakfast and never got out of bed before lunchtime. What a great role model.

Levine, Searls, Weinberger and Locke ‘The Cluetrain Manifesto’ – one of my favourite books of all time which I rhapsodized about before. 

British teenagers are turning to alcohol to relieve boredom according to a new survey launched today (5^th August) by alcohol charity Drinkaware.  Nearly one in 10 young people aged 16 and 17 (8 per cent) drink at least once a week simply because they are bored*.  With the school summer holidays in full swing and half of teenagers (51 per cent) reporting they get bored in the holidays, Drinkaware is warning that drinking among young people is likely to increase.

To combat boredom over the summer and remind teenagers they can have fun without drinking alcohol, Drinkaware has launched ‘The Ultimate Day’ competition, setting young people a challenge to creatively demonstrate their ideal day without alcohol. For five lucky winners, their ultimate day will become a reality.

The Drinkaware research of 16 and 17 year olds also shows that:

• Three fifths (61%) will be drinking alcohol in the summer holidays;
• Given £20 per week to spend, more than one in 10 (13 per cent) said they would be more likely to spend the money on alcohol and partying than shopping, entertainment or transport;
• Nearly one third of young people (29 per cent) have drunk alcohol out of boredom.

Chris Sorek, Chief Executive of Drinkaware, says: “Research shows that young people drink when they’re bored and over the summer holidays this is likely to increase.  There are plenty of free activities young people can do over the summer to keep entertained, including playing sport, volunteering or being part of the audience of their favourite TV show.

“Over the holidays and throughout the year it’s really important that 16 and 17 year olds don’t unintentionally put themselves at risk when they drink alcohol.  Drinking can increase the chances of either being the victim or a perpetrator of a crime and having unprotected sex leading to sexually transmitted infections and unwanted pregnancies.  If young people are drinking they should eat something beforehand, space their alcoholic drinks with water or soft drinks, look after their mates and if they’re out, plan how they’re going to get home.

“The Ultimate Day competition helps remind young people that you don’t need to have alcohol to have fun.  Applications will be judged on their creativity so instead of drinking when they’re bored over the holidays, young people can spend time working on their competition entries.”

Young people can take part in ‘The Ultimate Day’ competition by uploading entries to www.theultimateday.co.uk and visitors to the site can vote for their favourite entries.  The top voted for entries will be judged by a panel including a young person under 18 and Drinkaware representatives.  The closing date for the competition is 31^st August and terms and conditions will apply. Winners will be announced in September.

The search for love is a challenge almost as old as time. It’s been chronicled more intensively in literature and film than any other subject and, if you listen to the majority of conversations in bars and offices, our interest in analysing the intricacies of love is as strong as ever.

This year, our search for love has intensified: 95% of the 11,309 people questioned as part of The LoveGeist Report 2009 survey said they aspire to be in a long term relationship and love has risen up the priority list for many with 65% saying it is more important to them than it was a year ago.

But although the search for love is old, the love landscape that we are confronted with has changed beyond recognition.

People now turn to the internet to help them find love, as naturally as they do to manage any other aspect of their lives. The interesting aspect of this change isn't the technology story, or even the question of our relationship with technology. At match.com, the thing we're most fascinated by is people's attitudes towards love and the big change that we have seen over the last ten years is that people are increasingly determined to take control of their own romantic destiny. Fatalism used to be mistaken for romanticism: true love was not something you found, it was something that found you.

By 2009, the data suggests that romantic fatalism has gone the way of the chastity belt and the chaperone. We've realised that not only can we take charge of our own destinies, but it's right that we do. Love is a prize worth working for. The internet has played its part in driving this change by giving us the tools we need –since 2005, 6.5 million people in the UK have turned to match.com in their search for love - but I think the change is part of a wider trend. The age of deference is receding and we have found the courage to shrug off Cupid and Fate.

And that's lucky, because the challenge of finding love isn't getting any easier. Demographic studies suggest that the single population in this country is growing fast – according to reports, there will be 16 million singles in the UK by 2010, compared with 14 million in 2007.

The LoveGeist Report 2009 suggests we are getting more selective about our partners too. The natural corollary to the decline of romantic fatalism is a rise in our expectations. Over the past year, 52% of people questioned said that they had become fussier in what they look for in a partner. Some people might regard that as a worrying trend - that it suggests our expectations are becoming unrealistic. I don't believe that. When you examine what people actually say they're looking for, their expectations seem pretty reasonable to me: mutual values, personal drive and a shared sense of humour are what matter most to us.

Online is never going to be a replacement for meeting face to face, and we would never want it to be. But when you consider the things we say we're looking for, the internet is ideally suited to the search. Written exchanges between two people can reveal much more about ourselves than a chat in a pub and - as writers have known for hundreds of years - it can be an incredibly intimate medium. The internet has actually re-introduced us to the power of the written word. In that respect, perhaps the tools we use in our search for love aren't so new after all.

63% of Brits value “true love” more than ever and the Welsh are most romantic of all

The largest and most comprehensive study of contemporary love and dating in modern Britain commissioned by match.com has found that love and romance are increasingly important to the country’s single population. Two thirds (63%) say they are prioritising “true love” more now than they were one year ago and flings are out of fashion.

The LoveGeist Report 2009 has further identified a “reality gap” between romantic aspirations and the number of UK singles forecast to continue its rapid growth from 12 million to 16 million by 2011*.  Whilst marriage rates have fallen to their lowest since records began**, the report indicates an increasing belief in long-term commitment, working hard to find the ‘right’ partner and sustaining relationships.  In fact, 95% of singles surveyed say they are looking for long term love. 

Dr Monica Whitty, psychologist at Nottingham Trent University and report author explains; “A new cultural shift is afoot.  The report suggests Britain is moving away from its throw away culture in favour of sustainable long term relationships and finding the right match. Over half of singles say they have become more fussy about who they date and 86% say they will work harder to fix problems in future relationships.”

These findings are among those in The LoveGeist Report 2009 commissioned by match.com, the site that helps millions of people find love and compiled by Dr Monica Whitty and Tom Buchanan, scientists from the universities of Nottingham Trent and Westminster respectively.  The definitive annual study will track the UK’s changing attitudes to love and relationships and studied over 16,000 people, through a huge survey, trend analysis from match.com’s members, focus  groups (single and married men and women), in-depth interviews and opinions from leading experts in psychology, relationships, dating and anthropology about our future of love.

The full LoveGeist Report 2009 is available online and features a fully-interactive UK map with a breakdown of the key findings by region and 34 major towns and cities: www.lovegeist.co.uk The headline findings of this year’s study include:

Welsh Are Most Romantic...

The LoveGeist Report 2009 used The Romantic Beliefs Scale originally developed by academics Sprecher and Metts, to measure levels of romance across the country and found a comfortable romantic belt around the UK’s middle. People in Wales are the most romantic, followed by the East Midlands, West Midlands and Northern Ireland, with the Scots and those in Greater Londoner trailing at the bottom.  

Londoners maybe the least romantic, but they are the most pragmatic in love, with 66% of singles wanting to get married to cement a long term commitment (12% higher than the national average). 

The Welsh are certainly the most romantic at heart, but when it comes to splashing the cash, single men in Swansea are the least likely to pay for a first date (62%).  Lucky ladies in Middlesbrough will find the highest contingent of chivalrous men in the country with 100% saying they will open doors for their date and 93% will also pay for a first rendezvous.

The End of Fast Food Love...

Contrary to our ‘fast food’ throw away culture of late The LoveGeist Report 2009 has found not only are 86% prepared to work harder to solve issues in future relationships, but there’s a sense that love is not something that should be rushed.  Getting to know someone properly is key.  68% said they need to know someone for a period of time before they fall in love and only one third felt they would be able to fall in love immediately, even if they met the right person.

Love is…What is love? is a question that has long perplexed scholars, writers and poets. 

The LoveGeist Report 2009 found love in modern Britain runs deep and emotional satisfaction and personal development are important. Gone are the grand gestures in the name of love we’ve seen throughout history.  Nearly nine in ten (86%) said they’d prefer a partner to show their love through considerate gestures rather than lavish gifts.  Furthermore, 77% believe that falling in love means being with someone who helps to make them a better person.  68% reject the notion that love is a ‘thunderbolt’ saying that ‘true love’ grows over time and people want relationships that are selfless, helping them to be more confident, more challenged, more motivated and happier. 

 The One

 Men proved significantly more romantic than women on the Romantics Beliefs Scale, so it’s perhaps not surprising that it is men who are more likely to believe in ‘the one’, a person out there who you have a deeper connection with above all others. Women are more pragmatic and believe ‘the one’ is about the right time and the right place.  For singles of both sexes finding a long term relationship is a priority with the majority clear about exactly what and who they are looking for.

Jason Stockwood, managing director at match.com ,believes the recent surge in memberships to online dating sites reflects the increasing priority for long term relationships; “Dating sites allow you to be really specific about what and who you are looking for identifying potential deal breakers early.  Sophisticated matchmaking technology facilitates really compatible matches based on expectations, values, likes and dislikes.”

PR 16/07

Britain’s drinks industry today announces a £100 million social marketing campaign aimed at encouraging more responsible drinking among young adults and shifting attitudes towards drunkenness.

NMA Jul 17th - Alex Farber

Match.com has launched an interactive channel on the BT Vision IPTV service as part of the dating site’s cross-platform strategy.

BT Vision’s 423,000 subscribers can now search for potential partners via their TV using the Match.com service, which includes all of its primary functionality such as viewing messages, sending ‘winks’, searching and updating profiles.

The channel is available to access via the BT Vision EPG.Jason Stockwood, Match.com MD, said this was a vital component alongside existing online and mobile channels.

“There has to be greater convergence for audiences,” said Stockwood. “When we advertise on TV we see massive spikes to the site within seconds, so people are used to interacting in more consistent ways.”

He added that he hoped offering the service via TV would make browsing for a potential partner a more social experience compared with the online service, which tends to be done alone. 

Jeremy Rosenberg, business development manager for BT Vision, said he was keen to work with a series of interactive channel partners. “From a functionality point of view, the Match.com channel is very new for us. There’s a great opportunity to take advantage of our IPTV browser application,” he added.   

In January Honda launched a dedicated video channel on the BT Vision service, Honda TV.

I was in a meeting with Chris and Ben from Drinkaware yesterday and realised that about half way through that I had started to morph into a 3^rd rate Anthony Robbins or a 154^th rate urban Lao Tze (always trying to reference that Philosophy degree:-). I thought I jot down a few of the things they were unfortunate to hear me spewing under the general idea of things I wish I’d worked out earlier in my life. It’s clearly not exhaustive, in no particular order and I am aware some of this is paraphrased so apologies for not citing the references;

·         Celebrate your successes and learn from your mistakes but don’t dwell too long on either. Sail a steady course through the middle of all your experience and keep learning as you go.

·         Trust your instincts. You have them for a reason. Try and marry them to data where possible, they make a beautiful couple. Alone they can make unreliable friends.

·         Don’t try to be something you are not. For me the greatest qualities people can have are honesty, humility, humour and passion.

·         The smartest people are not necessarily the people managing the organisation.

·         Hire people who are smarter than you and will push you to improve. If you are the smartest person in the room you are probably in the wrong room.

·         All of the people I know who have been successful have been prepared to work hard for it.

·         The purpose of formal education should be to give you the tools and appetite so that you can spend the rest of your life learning.

·         As a manager at any work function it’s invariably always a good idea to leave if people start drinking shorts.

·         99% of all things you worry about do not happen so try not to worry.

·         The 1% of things that do happen invariably you can’t change so don’t worry about them.

·         Ask for help if you need it as most people are hardwired to be good – see www.horsesmouth.co.uk

·         Never tell people not to do something. Show them the arguments and trust them to make their own decisions. The best advice is to surround yourselves with good friends who look out for you when doing something inadvisable.

·         If you work with Americans it is useful to express yourselves through sports and war metaphors if you want to be understood.

·         Irony isn’t lost on all Americans.

·         No one can adequately explain double-irony.

·         Marketing isn’t that complicated. Think of the problem you are trying to solve for people and message that with a multi-million pound TV and SEM budget.

·         In Marketing never let any work be criticised for it’s production values. Your idea’s should be the focus of attention, anything else is just lazy.

·         There is no such thing as a selfless act.

·         Be generous with your ideas and time. You will get it back.

·         Remain inquisitive.

·         Everything is possible.

I’ve just left the 2 day event astounded by the quality of speakers and range of ideas debated. 

Couple of highlights include;

Dr Dieter Zetsche (Head of Mercedes) saying that the future of cars may be the shift from personal ownership towards centralised car sharing.

Franco Bernabe (CEO Telecom Italia) predicting that the most interesting trend in mobile will be ‘objects talking to one another’ to help create efficiencies in everyday living. (Separately this theme was picked up later by Larry Page who is involved with projects to create the first mass produced automated car (e.g. no driver) to help reduce the 2m deaths that occur each year through traffic accidents). He also spoke as the most important trend in the World Economy will be the transition of China from being primarily a producer to becoming a consumer as America loses its preeminent position in the world in regards to this.

Carlie Mayfield (Chairman John Lewis) an analogy for the opportunity for innovation and entrepreneurship in this downturn can be found in nature with the effect of forest fires. Some plants can only germinate in the post-fire environment such of the seeds of one of the biggest trees, the Sequoia.

Nassim Taleb (Author of ‘The Black Swan’) stated that we haven’t seen the worst of the recession yet and that in a world of over a million economists only 5 or so predicted the current crisis and therefore the their profession and the computer modeling they undertake should be totally disregarded.

Mark Thompson’s (Director General BBC) comments around user engagement and the fact that on the day of the heaviest snowfall in the UK this year the BBC received 30k individual pieces of content from the public.

Anshu Jain (Head of Global Markets Deutsche Bank) claiming that when the US housing market stabilises and doesn’t drop for 3 consecutive months this will be the best indicator that the current economic crisis has bottomed out.

The Prince of Wales discussing the urgency of the issues surrounding climate change and specifically promoting his new campaign www.rainforestsos.org including a wonderful quote that “when natures capital is spent we cannot replace it with an injection of cash”. He also talked about the need for individual engagement to promote CSR and mobilise business towards greater accountability and responsibility to its local environment www.bitc.org.uk

Kristian Segerstrale (CEO Playfish) talking about his foray into the $50bn gaming industry but with the focus away from the solitary activity of traditional computer gaming and socialising the activity with your friend network so that the ‘emotional driver is your relationships and not the game itself’.

The 2 days concluded with Eric Schmidt, Larry Page discussing with Richard Branson his philanthropic and charitable activities specifically The Elders where both Peter Gabriel and himself have assembled people of ‘high moral authority’ such as Kofi Annan, Jimmy Carter and Nelson Mandela amongst others to try and help find solutions to problems that have failed through traditional partisan political agendas by their direct intervention and dialogue (Zimbabwe, Iraq etc)

These were only a few of the speakers but represent the amazing calibre of thinkers and innovators present.  It seems to me that only a company like Google that leads the way in thought leadership in so many areas could assemble such a range of people to contribute to the significant issues on discussion.  Whilst not naïve to the commercial imperatives that Google has I can’t help but feel that the drive towards ‘making things work better’ as Larry Page said still sits at the heart of this phenomenal business and the authenticity that their leader projects.

Favourite quotes of the two days from David Jones (CEO Havas) attributed to African Tribesman - "If you want to go fast go alone, if you want to go far go together" and Lorraine Twohill (VP Marketing Google) attributed to Andy Warhol " Time changes things but you have to change things for yourself".

All the speakers and discussions will be posted on YouTube in the coming days.